When I was growing up, I used to think I was not very smart. I was behind my peers in academics, I was not really interested in much, I got bored easily. Exams were very hard for me; I just couldn’t understand the question which made it very difficult to find the right answer. All I really enjoyed is sports and anything that was active and social – hence, my parents had me in swimming since I was 5, that was my main sport, and then I tried other sports – track (I was pretty good!), basketball (I am 5’1 so….), and softball (too slow and boring for me).
After graduating high school, I was not able to get into a university because
1. My grades were below average
2. I couldn’t pass the SAT due to my exam challenges
I opted out for a community college…. for 4 years – it took me that long to get my associates (which typically takes 2 years) and be able to transfer to a 4-year school. I changed my major 5 times in college before finally settling on something that did not require math or science or anything analytical where I struggled the most.
Upon graduating with my Bachelor’s, I couldn’t find a job because again I didn’t have many interests or knew what I wanted to do, and since I didn’t think I was all that smart, on a deeper level I probably didn’t really think anyone would hire me. I kept working part time jobs waitressing, teaching swim lessons, and random jobs like that. In my efforts of staying relevant in the world and trying to show that I am not just some useless college grad, I decided to stay in school further and pursue my Master’s.
(Side note: I find it funny when people are impressed with someone’s credentials such as a grad degree, not realizing that (sometimes!) the person got it to mask their insecurities or just to prolong the inevitable reality of having to find a career job or as a result of not being able to find one at all).
I got my grad degree (by that time, I figured out a way to study smart and not hard and just knew how to get decent grades), and through some friends got my first career job! Best day ever!... I mean I hated that job after one year and cried in the bathroom a few times, BUT I was officially a ‘useful’ member of society.
Fast forward, I have held various jobs since that day (and if count all my side/part time jobs since the age of 15, I had over 17 jobs by the time I was 25 years old). I’ve also started a couple of businesses (one of which is active today), founded a non -profit (active today), and over the last 10 + years built a solid personal brand in the field of talent development, wellness, and performance. And, most importantly, I absolutely love what I do each and every day. I get to create content, build programs, and coach and mentor others – and learn every day from my colleagues and clients – and have the freedom to experiment and try new things. I have built a fulfilling career and a small business, and I feel like I am just getting started.
I credit a lot of my current fulfillment today to the fact that I did experiment and A LOT! I was often afraid when making shifts in career (and life), but kept moving through the fear and just kept going. I believe moving through that fear is where you build resilience and grit and that is what eventually lands you where you need to be. I remember being judged for certain decision because they weren't clear or they were rushed and so on. I remember doubting myself but still doing what I felt was the right choice for me at that particular time. The key is to think long term, stay patient, and trust the process. That has been the hardest - trusting myself and my gut to drive me in the right direction. I think that is all we can do is make decisions based on information we have, at that particular moment in time and in that specific context of your life. And, guess what? It is also okay to change your mind down the road if you get new information or priorities change, so stay flexible!
Looking back, I realized we don’t know what we don’t know and often we must go through the experiences to understand the journey. I like to say it is a process and that process takes time. We want to skip and follow shortcuts, but in most cases, it is just not the reality. However, if I could go back and tell myself a few things to not be so harsh on myself throughout that process, it would be the following:
·Just because you are not strong academically, doesn’t make you a loser or dumb
·Focus on things you enjoy and maximize on those areas
·Don’t let society put you in a box – you don’t have to go to college, you don’t have to have your career figured out in your 20s, you don’t have to have a high salary right out of college, you don’t have to stay in a job if you don’t like it, you don’t have to apologize for having multiple interests. DO YOU! I promise you no one is watching, and nobody cares, everyone is just worried about themselves. The only thing you have to do is stay curious, explore, try things, and keep elevating yourself.
·Keep trying and experimenting with as many jobs as you need – as early in your career as possible – no one will care how many jobs you’ve had in your teens or early 20s. That stuff only really impacts your career well into your 30s and 40s.
·Find your creative outlets and your community.
·Keep learning – it never stops.
·Being a jack of all trades is often a blessing – having the ability to pay your bills no matter what because you can always find a job doing something – is a win!
·Take care of your body and mind – stay active, sleep plenty, eat clean, educate yourself about your body inside and out.
Looking back at your own journey, what would you add to this list?
If you are going through career ups and/or downs, and need a soundboard or a strategy call, book me in at this link.
Elena
After graduating high school, I was not able to get into a university because
1. My grades were below average
2. I couldn’t pass the SAT due to my exam challenges
I opted out for a community college…. for 4 years – it took me that long to get my associates (which typically takes 2 years) and be able to transfer to a 4-year school. I changed my major 5 times in college before finally settling on something that did not require math or science or anything analytical where I struggled the most.
Upon graduating with my Bachelor’s, I couldn’t find a job because again I didn’t have many interests or knew what I wanted to do, and since I didn’t think I was all that smart, on a deeper level I probably didn’t really think anyone would hire me. I kept working part time jobs waitressing, teaching swim lessons, and random jobs like that. In my efforts of staying relevant in the world and trying to show that I am not just some useless college grad, I decided to stay in school further and pursue my Master’s.
(Side note: I find it funny when people are impressed with someone’s credentials such as a grad degree, not realizing that (sometimes!) the person got it to mask their insecurities or just to prolong the inevitable reality of having to find a career job or as a result of not being able to find one at all).
I got my grad degree (by that time, I figured out a way to study smart and not hard and just knew how to get decent grades), and through some friends got my first career job! Best day ever!... I mean I hated that job after one year and cried in the bathroom a few times, BUT I was officially a ‘useful’ member of society.
Fast forward, I have held various jobs since that day (and if count all my side/part time jobs since the age of 15, I had over 17 jobs by the time I was 25 years old). I’ve also started a couple of businesses (one of which is active today), founded a non -profit (active today), and over the last 10 + years built a solid personal brand in the field of talent development, wellness, and performance. And, most importantly, I absolutely love what I do each and every day. I get to create content, build programs, and coach and mentor others – and learn every day from my colleagues and clients – and have the freedom to experiment and try new things. I have built a fulfilling career and a small business, and I feel like I am just getting started.
I credit a lot of my current fulfillment today to the fact that I did experiment and A LOT! I was often afraid when making shifts in career (and life), but kept moving through the fear and just kept going. I believe moving through that fear is where you build resilience and grit and that is what eventually lands you where you need to be. I remember being judged for certain decision because they weren't clear or they were rushed and so on. I remember doubting myself but still doing what I felt was the right choice for me at that particular time. The key is to think long term, stay patient, and trust the process. That has been the hardest - trusting myself and my gut to drive me in the right direction. I think that is all we can do is make decisions based on information we have, at that particular moment in time and in that specific context of your life. And, guess what? It is also okay to change your mind down the road if you get new information or priorities change, so stay flexible!
Looking back, I realized we don’t know what we don’t know and often we must go through the experiences to understand the journey. I like to say it is a process and that process takes time. We want to skip and follow shortcuts, but in most cases, it is just not the reality. However, if I could go back and tell myself a few things to not be so harsh on myself throughout that process, it would be the following:
·Just because you are not strong academically, doesn’t make you a loser or dumb
·Focus on things you enjoy and maximize on those areas
·Don’t let society put you in a box – you don’t have to go to college, you don’t have to have your career figured out in your 20s, you don’t have to have a high salary right out of college, you don’t have to stay in a job if you don’t like it, you don’t have to apologize for having multiple interests. DO YOU! I promise you no one is watching, and nobody cares, everyone is just worried about themselves. The only thing you have to do is stay curious, explore, try things, and keep elevating yourself.
·Keep trying and experimenting with as many jobs as you need – as early in your career as possible – no one will care how many jobs you’ve had in your teens or early 20s. That stuff only really impacts your career well into your 30s and 40s.
·Find your creative outlets and your community.
·Keep learning – it never stops.
·Being a jack of all trades is often a blessing – having the ability to pay your bills no matter what because you can always find a job doing something – is a win!
·Take care of your body and mind – stay active, sleep plenty, eat clean, educate yourself about your body inside and out.
Looking back at your own journey, what would you add to this list?
If you are going through career ups and/or downs, and need a soundboard or a strategy call, book me in at this link.
Elena